I hated myself for it, and God as well, asking him why He had to make me that way. I hadn't wanted to like it, I just did. Doing things, sexual things...with that animal had felt normal. I felt an attraction for Muddy that I should have felt for boys, but didn't. I prayed to God and all His angels asking them to help me. I promised I'd never do it again, if they saved me from my brother. I'd do anything God wanted if He'd just make this nightmare go away.I woke up frightened. As if someone had. Her globes – big, round and firm were half exposed. She said, ‘Nikhil, how are you feeling?’ I could not answer. She said, ‘You are like my son. I want you to drink me, I mean I want to feed you – with my breasts.’ Saying so, she pulled one side of her bra up and pushed the nipple in my mouth. She said, ‘Suck me, Nikhil. Suck hard.’ I started sucking her nipple hard. I said. ‘Bhabima, nothing is coming out. Where is the milk?’ She said, ‘There is no milk. You only keep on sucking. It gives me. More

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