‘If by that you mean the pain of orgasm denial, then yes. Other kinds of pain are nice, too. Some kind of feedback is much better than none.’ ‘...s there something particularly special about the feedback of pain or denial?’ ‘I’ve often wondered about that,’ Zerzinski said, with a familiar, thoughtful tone. ‘Maybe it comes down to the feeling that they’re doing something that’s clearly for me. Because I know it hurts them, and they do it anyway. Then I know they must be doing it for me. And that. Then he would get horny and it over took his conflicting conscence and not until he shot off did he start to hate himself again and want to stop what he was doing. In the beginning he was horny and both of us being sexually oriented to being straight he wanted a reason to be able to beat off with someone and it be okay. He never thought it would go any further but as time progressed and his hormones took over, he just couldnt help himself when we were alone and nak** (I got a thrill out of that. More

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