Then his betrayal, his rat, Sarah's releasing it, my tantrums and my purposely re-experiencing the hatred and anger Steven had given me for him just t... make me stronger so I could get my revenge on him. These things were painful to experience a second time through, but not as painful as the things I did for Steven. Enslaving Suzi... Watching her as they gave her the drug and her spirit slowly drained away... Helping Steven break her in... Oh God, if that didn't hurt... It was probably the. ..click, the pot brews the dark reddish drink. Somewhere in the distance a shower runs. It's too damn hot in here. I can feel the sweat bead on my face. Ten minutes ago I got out of the shower, I feel filthy already. I grab my forehead and try to count off my daily morning headache. A stupid meditation trick I read in some book. 10...9...with each number the pain is supposed to diminish. I give up after counting down twice and pop three tablets of aspirin. The pot stops and I. More

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