Cold fear gripped myguts. After all I had gone through. All the changes I was stillexperiencing how could I be rejected to face the world on my own ...s aheterosexual but now exceedingly effeminate boy. Suddenly I realised Icould not go backwards to who I had been I had to go on. I could notloose Helen so I reluctantly agreed to have my last vestige ofmasculinity corrupted if not driven from me. I convinced myself mydecision was the best of two unpalatable choices but deep down I knew Ihad a. "I am presuming that there is a damn good reason fo' this." he asks after we're in the car. He's pretty pissed."It's at Trina's." That is a location, not a reason. A reason is explanation that makes sense of an event an' I am still waitin' for a good one." He using his 'court room voice' - very slow, very formal mostly to control his tone and his accent. He's pretty damn pissed."Ran out of gas."He stops the car. Now I'm in for it. "You have no god damned idea how much trouble you - you both -. More

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