Once again, I must begin by thanking ‘Aubrey’ – my girlfriend, partner-in-crime and mistress – for allowing me to immortalise our wonderful re...ationship in this way. * As with most evenings, the traffic in London was proving to be a frightful pain. True, it was not exactly gridlocked, but the endless stream of cars was sufficient to reduce movement to a crawl, and from time to time, the driver of the bus on which I was sat would blare his horn loudly as he was cut off by one of the many. He smiles, appreciatively, lovingly. She pounces like a cat on a mole, grabbing his left wrist with both hands, her left breast pasting him across the chin. “Whatchya doin, love” she challenges! “Just stretching, Ruby, just stretching,” he counters. “Reaaaaaaally,” she parries. “Then, here, let me help you stretch.” Both hands clench in an iron grip around his left wrist and she pulls it toward her. He does not budge. As much as he may regret it and need aspirin tomorrow, he steels his arm. More

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