That part of our lives had not been a happy one, and was probably at least partly to blame for the way we both approached life and love, Jerry pretend...ng that he didn’t need deeper meaning, that casual, temporary flings made him happy, me being stuck in friendship or one-sided love stories, always opening myself up to people who could somehow sense that I was easy to manipulate, easy to use. I stood up and started clearing the table, sitting around dwelling about the past wouldn’t get us. She pulled out cocaine, I had never done cocaine before… we did a few lines, I was so horny, I wanted to fuck Ally. We kept talking, she said she does private work on the side, if I was interested… I explained to her that I live with my parents still,but she had an apartment. So I said sure. She said after her shift. Since I had her number I drove home in my shitty used car and took a shower. I shaved my pubes (I wanted this to be sexy). I was a thin guy with about a 7 inch dick hard, nice. More

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