Peter, Peter, something or other..."PINOCCHIO had a human girlfriend who would sometimes complain about splinters when they were having sex. Pinocchio... therefore, went to visit Gepetto to see if he could help. Gepetto suggested he try a little sandpaper wherever indicated and Pinocchio skipped away enlightened.A couple weeks later, Gepetto saw Pinocchio bouncing happily through town and asked him, "How's the girlfriend?" Pinocchio replied, "Who needs a girlfriend?"LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD was. I continued buttering my toast, the image of his eight inches imprinted onto my toast, as I imagined rolling it up and eating him like a hot-dog.He finished emptying some cornflakes into the bowl and looked at me, his daughter, 'What do you see when you look at me', I asked him.'I see a beautiful young woman', he replied with consummate ease, my nipples hardened, they seemed to have a life of their own in the morning, a dangerous time for me, as I always awoke in the morning with a deep urge to. More

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