I have allowed myself to get swept away by those I have surrounded myself instead of holding true to all that he taught me. My shame is great. He says...that he does not hold me responsible for the changes he has noticed and I am sure there will be more that become apparent to his unwavering gaze. He knows me like no other and the more time I spend with him, the more I reveal, without even knowing, of how I have let myself go once he was gone. I feel so much shame but yet still find hope in the. All those "chores" could be moved along if a pretty wife applied in person.Sometimes a house party would be arranged and the guests were suitably "entertained." For appearances, the wife was "shocked" at the blunt proposals and the husband pretending to be horrified that she was to be bedded to further his requirements. Even when we talked with friends, the tenor was usually, "But you know how it is... you have to make the best of it."Yes, of course, make the best of it... while his wife. More

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