People connected with me for what it gave them and I connected for what it gave me. I had control. I had dominance. They had status by virtue of the c...nnection."It made me pathologically selfish. I saw everything and everyone in terms of what was in it for me. I barely recognized there was another side to the equation. And, to take a page from your ubiquitous math analogies, the equation was always an inequality - Ashley is greater than whomever."It denied me the ability to appreciate almost. As we approached the coal yard John said “You coming in the yard with me then?”I nodded and followed him to one of the sheds near the back. The door had a broken window and John reached in and opened it. We went in and there was an old stair way that led to some offices; up we climbed and entered one with a desk and a couple of battered old chairs.John turned and sat on the desk. “Well” he said “Are you going to do it then?”I froze, and then I was suddenly walking towards him, as if by remote. More

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