* A man calls 911 and says "I think my wife is dead". The operator says, "How do you know?" The man says "The sex is about the same, but the ironing i... piling up!"* I was explaining to my wife last night that when you die you get reincarnated but must come back as a different creature. She said she would like to come back as a cow. I said, "You obviously haven't been listening."* My wife has been missing a week now. The police said to prepare for the worst. So, I had to go down to Goodwill to. This gave me a few glances of her very ample bosom and then she handed Katie to me to rock while she took a nap. I was having a ball playing with Katie, talking to her in a quiet voice and pointing out different colors on her toys. I knew full well that she didn’t understand me, but I hoped that my voice was soothing to her. Soon I realized that I desperately needed the bathroom but it was inside Gloria’s bedroom. I laid Katie down on her blanket and crept into the bedroom as quietly as I. More

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