"I noticed Julian's assistant, the voluptuous girl who had been moving markers on my first visit. She was busy as before but I noticed her take a swif...ly hidden glance across at me. Had Castwich told her of my work I wondered? Did she harbour desires of being treated as Helena was, perhaps?As Julian completed his tasks at the Plan I permitted myself a few moments imagining the girl impaled on the Orrery or crouching in the cage at Highgate. It was a pleasant diversion.Julian put down the last. And I also ended up getting blackmailed into meeting another guy, and I guess you could call that **** number two.Those three months were the worst of my life, I was mourning my marriage, I was having flashback episodes because of the **** and the trauma of the relationship I was in. I was suicidal at best. Sometimes just staring at walls for hours, sometimes hurting myself. And of course, having lots of pointless sex.Then I met my current partner, and fell in love. We were instant, absolute. More

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