I had no idea it would be almost twenty minutes of gut wrenching sorrow before she began to calm down.Have you ever seen a loved one with a devastatin... loss, an inconsolable sorrow? Remember how it hurts you to see them hurt so much? We were like that for Mary.I thought her sorrow must be about Andy and the baby, my baby Andy was carrying. All sorts of horrible thoughts crossed my mind: diseases, genetic abnormalities, any thing you could imagine being wrong.Mary was spent, but her body was. The nurse tried to park me in the sun. Stupid. Too much glare on the screen and I don’t want to go blind. They want us out of the room so they can change the beds. Of course, they have to make Renie’s up with her in it but they kick me out. Tried to make me ride in a chair. Fuck that. The walker is bad enough. Of course, I know why they want to wheel me out. It’s faster. Me shuffling along with my walker takes twice as long as having a nurse just wheel me out and leave me.I sit under the canopy. More

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