She just stood there, apparently not yet satisfied with the explanation."When I accused you of keeping a secret, I was keeping an even bigger secret m...self. I know I was wrong, I knew then it was wrong, but I was afraid to tell you. I c–" Afraid? Why?" And there it was. A big moment of self-reflection, to try and figure out why she had been so afraid to tell Sam about her… addiction. The answer was clear as day, but it carried some implications she rather wouldn't have faced."I didn't want you. He had to entertain the idea that he could be stranded in this lush version of hell with Hilderich as his sole companion for the rest of their lives. The thought alone was unbearable. It wasn't because of Hilderich, the man kept interesting company; living without Celia though would be impossible for him. He'd rather take his own life than be forced to live with memories of her alone, each waking moment.Amonas was sitting cross-legged without the cover of the small makeshift shelter he had. More

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